My Magical Thoughts

I like William Beckett.Alot.

Holy Immaturity.

So I discovered that my old friends refer to me as “The one who shall not be named”

….

First of all,I’m not Lord Voldemort,god dammit.

And second,grow up.I can still say YOUR names,see?Sam and Cheyenne.Sam and Cheyenne Sam and Cheyenne SAM AND CHEYENNE.

It’s not hard.So unless you have amnesia,and forgot who I was,saying Marissa is still humanly possible.You won’t fucking die.I promise.

And they wonder why I was so fed up with them.

Herp derp.

Our own folks.

So…I hate my peers.

A lot.

Half of them are snooty girls who wear Uggs,and Northface,and are some of the dumbest chicks I’ve ever seen.It’s worse than watching a turtle stuck on it’s back.

And the other half is those “gangsters” who wear the stupid hats,basketball shorts,and have floppy Justin Doucher hair.

And the rest are scene kid douchemasters,creepy obnoxious freaks,and people who just should be shot in the face.I consider myself just a bystander in this insane world,going with whatever’s thrown at me.But sometimes it just gets so frustrating that I want to yell at the world.My peers need to realize they look like confused whores and that 15 years from now,”swag” won’t pay the bills.Just saying..

My Sister.And my life.

Yesterday,my older sister had her seventh seizure.She’s had epilepsy for about two years.The cause is usually sleep deprivation,or drinking something with loads of caffeine.Along with that,yesterday was the first time I’ve ever seen my own mother,who is one of the strongest people I know,break down in tears.I’ve never understood how bad my life actually was until today,and it sucks.I’ve never realized because all of my “big problems” were so simple and dumb.I lost my”best friend”?I realized she’s horrible,and there are millions and millions of other people in this world.I’m already surrounded by people who love me.I’m not gonna let some high-headed worthless punks get me down.The stress in school?Possibly because I was too busy worrying over what Sam (old best friend) was doing,or with what Sam’s crush did,or what Sam was mad at me about.I never had time to do anything because I decided she was my “best” friend.SHE was the main priority.And now she’s gone,and I’ve been pretty focused,and steadily bringing my grades up.Basically,I’ve come to realize that,yeah,my life does suck.Yeah,it’s not perfect.It’s getting better though.And seeing my little nephews run around and play on a little Skype window gives me hope that someday,I will get out of this little nutshell of a town,and I will watch them grow up,and I’ll enjoy my life.This terrible life will get twenty BAJILLION times better.Alexis won’t have seizures anymore,Mom won’t cry,Dad will stop being so cold,Ben will spend more time with us instead of being in the basement all day,Caitlin will get married and stop having to try to fix everyone’s crappy life,Ashley will marry someone with a job,and I’ll stop moping around like a depressed sack.